A response, of sorts.
Let me just say that I’ve never been one to pigeon-hole any musical genre & I’m extremely dubious of those who do & thus go in for the same hackneyed tricks that have been dealt out for decade upon decade. All the asinine pomp & “raw rock” in the world can’t hide a lack of vision or imagination. Or talent, for that matter. Still, there are those who continue to eat this kind of shit up, including Jesus Chainsaw Massacre. These poor guys provide the world with ample evidence as to their lack of even the most modest modicum of taste in both the music (?) they create & the music they promote on their God-forsaken poor excuse of a Geocities website wrenched from the clueless depths of 1994 that they pass as a blog.
While we’re on that subject, let’s take a minute to discuss that gem-like turd, a forum meant to both offend & provoke laughter that manages to do neither. Who the hell thinks this is funny anymore? Pre-teen boys across Middle America, I’m sure, but who else? Once you’ve gotten laid, read a book & seen the world a little bit the shit that tickles JCM’s funny bone will inevitably lose its once invaluable charm. Remember dead baby jokes? Weren’t those hilarious when you were ten? Then you stopped wetting the bed & you were a new person, all grown-up & sophisticated. “Jesus Chainsaw Massacre”? What does that even mean? Is that meant to bother my grandmother?
Don’t get me wrong, their website doesn’t manage to offend a single sensibility of mine other than an aesthetic sense. I actually enjoy abrasive humor when it isn’t shallow, lazy & facile. Unfortunately that brand of “humor” seems to be the sole offering from JCM apart from their wet-blanket bitching & juvenile, feckless, white-bread “observations”. I’m sure that if you’ve never been on the Internet before their harmless baby-boner snark will seem novel. However, this being my 28th year on Earth, I’ve enjoyed enough genuine wit that JCM just bores & mystifies me.
Now, Computer Perfection is far from greatness or, pardon me, perfection. If you don’t care for what we do, I’m sorry, I guess. I will say this, though: even I am not satisfied by what we’ve done. Keep in mind that we are still a brand-new band. The songs we perform have hardly been around a year. We are, though, looking forward to continually pushing forward and struggling towards more experimentation, innovation & just plain good, catchy songs. I’m well aware that there are people who don’t like our music & never will, but that doesn’t bother me in the least. What does bother me is the witless, cynical negativity that I see from the likes of the gentlemen (a term I use loosely) of the tragically-named Jesus Chainsaw Massacre. Attitudes like that not only contribute nothing but in fact detract from the otherwise dynamic & fruitful discourse that art can provide. I’d consider it no hyperbole to say that the world is better off without it, to say nothing of a tiny & perpetually struggling arts scene.
& this here, for the two people still reading this diatribe (hi Grandma!), is the crux of my beef with JCM’s off-hand, reptilian-brained criticisms, toothless though they may be. If you want to see what is wrong with Detroit’s music scene, fellas, I suggest you take a look in the mirror.
N. Francis Burgundy IV